Wow, ok totally embarrassed from my lack of reporting. I do have a few excuses. My wonderful husband graduated from his residency program and moved onto a fellowship program, we moved across the pacific ocean, found ourselves a lovely home, and these are just a few of the things that have kept me distant. I won't bore you with all the details. I am however here to report that things are moving quickly now with the adoption process!
I guess that just happens to be one of the things keeping me away as well. We started our APQ as soon as we got settled. I thought it was going to be a lot harder to make some of decision that we did, but after we really sat down and discussed each other's point of view, things just really fell into place. In all honesty, I thought it was really going to be difficult for my husband and I to see eye to eye some of it. When we were faced with the questions and then answering them, we both pretty much wanted the same thing. Our comfort levels were surprisingly similar. I guess i should have trusted "us" more before diving in? By the way, an APQ is an Adoption Planning Questionnaire. You basically have to go through a set of questions that are broken down into categories of desired race, setting a budget, the amount of contact with the birth parents, substance use during pregnancy, birth parent medical and family history, and then a set of random questions on why you think you would be good adoptive parents, your feelings about the birth mother, how you think you may want to interact with your child regarding being adopted, and so on, and so on. Either way, we got through the APQ holding hands and taking a lot of deep breathes.
We had our APQ interview and met our personal social worker and adoption coordinator that will be with us throughout the rest of the journey. During the interview our adoption specialist goes through each question and each answer and lets us know how our decisions may or may not effect our match. We got a great big "high five" from our coordinator and were told we could not have done a better APQ. YES!!! This just means we are in a good range with the other families without her intervention and should hopefully then be able to meet the agencies "waiting time" timelines. I mean come on, haven't i waited to be a mother long enough? Why does it always feel better when you think you fit into the big curve of statistical data? I usually like to be the person thinking outside of the box, but under these circumstances I guess I'm happy just to belong. Smile.
We contacted our homestudy provider, filled out our initial application, and have our first "interview" with them this Saturday! So keep your fingers crossed that all goes well! Sounds like this meeting is more about all the paperwork that now needs to be filled out for the homestudy progress and background checks. I have never seen so much paperwork and forms in my life! Between hubby and myself and our jobs, I'm starting to think the government may raise an eyebrow when our last names cross their desk again. I wish I could just say "hey, check out the last ten!" Hopefully that will actually make the process go smoother though? Either way, I feel like I'm filling out applications to become the presidents mother. It's really crazy, but yes worth it. And, I guess I could be filling out applications to become the presidents mother? Ha Ha!
Last but definitely not least, we dove head first into creating our profile. I had a pretty good feeling it was going to be difficult to put into words everything we want to share about us as individuals, as a couple, our feelings about becoming a parent, but man it's really really hard. I've learned quickly not to pick it apart. The words work because it's us in all it's honesty and sincerity. It's exciting, really really exciting.
We've set a goal for ourselves to be an ACTIVE family in six weeks and counting! So, I must close for now so we can reach that goal.
Love to you all!